It was this time one year ago that the little love of my life, Miss Tickles, died from several complications at 10 and a half.

I was a wreck for a long time. I didn’t know you could love a doggie so much. I would have never ever thought about getting another dog but it was obvious that my other dog Tessa was depressed from the passing as well. They grew up together their entire lives. Not only was she depressed she developed diabetes and cushings disease. I’m not a doctor but I feel like she got this from her sadness.
In December I finally decided “okay, maybe a puppy will bring some joy back into our hearts.” We got Dexter. And, it seemed to really help Tessa a lot. She has done really well, except for the past month where she seemed to have been slowing down a bit. I wasn’t real concerned. I just figured she is getting a little older. So when she didn’t feel like walking up the stairs I would carry her. If she didn’t want to finish her walk I would carry her.

Then this morning she couldn’t really get up. I gave her some honey in case her blood sugar was low. I tried giving her treats, she didn’t want it. She wouldn’t drink. Then she wouldn’t even lift her head for me. Suddenly she started breathing really heavy and I got this horrible sickness in my stomach.

I picked her up and put her in the car and was driving as fast as I can to the E.R. I looked over and she was losing consciousness. I screamed at her , “No don’t go to sleep!” She looked a couple of times when I yelled at her. I started shaking her and begging her not to go. The last time, when she looked at me, her eyes rolled back in her head and turned grey.

I ran screaming to the E.R. attendants. They rushed out and got her. I couldn’t talk because I was hysterical. They said she would be okay. When they came out they said “we’re sorry, we did all we could.”

As I’m writing this, I can’t believe this has happened again. I have cried and cried all day, since this started at 8:30 this morning. When I kissed her goodbye, I knew she was going to be with her sister and best friend. But that thought is still not strong enough to erase this pain.

If you haven’t heard about the details from Miss Tickles passing, you can read it here.